Monday, February 22, 2016

Weekly schlock and the downward Spiral

TIVO still thinks that it knows what I want to watch. I tend to give the list of suggested recordings a quick once over prior to deleting them. While doing so this time I happened upon a movie called Spiral.
I had no idea what it was about or who was in it, so of course I started watching it.
Here we have this guy Mason. He works for some kind of telesales company. He is pretty introverted and comes off very odd. He loves to paint, sketch and listen to smooth jazz. Mason also has an inhaler to help him when he has these crazy fits of craziness. He has no friends, but his boss a real winner named Berkley keeps tabs on him for some unknown reason.

Get ready for a lot of this.

One day super awkward and creepy vibe generating mason meets uber social and talky new co-worker Amber. They become best friends. Now we begin an annoying bit of dating between these two complete opposites.
While all this is going on we see that mason has some anxiety issues and these waking dream night terror visions too. There is also his apartment/portrait studio that has an ominous hallway. Plus he keeps thumbing through his little sketchbook without letting anyone see what he has drawn. It seems Mason has had a stable of beauties come into and out of his life and it appears the same thing has happened to all of them (drawn painted, had adult naughty times and then…..). This is all to build tension as we are supposed to think that Mason has lady trouble because he might be going all serial killer on them. He has he atypical movie tropes to support it. Well the super fun twist ending that how could you not see coming will tell you.

What happened to the ladies you ask? What is the deal with this guy?
Eventually, this all unravels in a not surprising way, especially if you have ever watched a lot of Alfred Hitchcock or Twilight Zone episodes. Hell you can probably guess just from reading my rambling about this movie.
Spiral is slooooooooooow. The first half hour just goes nowhere. I almost walked on this movie due to the incredible slowness. It doesn’t help either that the lead, Mason, is just so hard to watch, identify with or remotely care about. Add the random bits of jump cuts and a horrible jazz soundtrack (personally hate jazz but if like it then this soundtrack is AWESOME!) and it was an accomplishment for me to make it through this movie.
Besides the awkwardness of Mason there is the over the top crazy talkie Amber who falls for Mason. How does this happen? Let alone how do all the other ladies, who appear attractive from his paintings and drawings, keep flocking to this guy. He gives off this horrible creep-o vibe that ladies tend to avoid.

Spiraling into our hearts: The SheKnows film review
Add to that his boss/friend Berkley that is Mason’s friend or more like handler. He is pretty repulsive character playing the typical selfish, womanizing, smarmy office manager. Seen this type of character before, it is that they usually get knocked off or get their comeuppance in these films.

Wait. Is they guy I'm supposed to like in this film?

By the time all this was done Spiral is no more than a mediocre thriller with a lead that is almost impossible to watch and a meh! Twist. Wait! No…it’s a double meh! twist ending!

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