The REBOOT
The Original
THE FOG 2005
Here we have the same seaside town doing a 134 year anniversary of their town founders. Wait is 134 years a real anniversary thing? Anyway the whole creepy fog begins to arrive and ruin the lives of any and all the townsfolk with its cargo of ghost lepers. Especially, the ancestors of the original four founding fathers of the town.
Alright, the original was fun. The reboot was anything but that.
First the antagonist or ghost delivery system, the fog, is all C.G.I instead of old school practical. This is to be expected now a days. However, the old school fog machine effect looks and acts so much better than the computer effect fog. Yes I think that 30+ year old smoke machines work and look better than 2005 computer effects. Where one is slow, threatening and natural the other is fast and looks fake and unnatural.
Practical vs. CGI
The same goes for the ghosts. These were originally guys in costume that you never really saw, save one close-up maggoty face. They were creepy slow moving silhouettes and that was the few times you saw anything sans an arm or hand weapon. Here they are computer specters that are more akin to Pirates of the Caribbean or Haunted Mansion flunkies. Well that is when they do show them in fancy and attempted scary tight close-ups. For the most part they are just see quasi-transparent shadows in the fog. They seem almost like ghostly place holders instead of a threat. Hell in one sequence in the graveyard the ghost captain is practically running. Well, it is more like a bad 2x sped up walking, and it looks abysmal. Bad computer effects are bad and this is 2005. You expect sketchy C.G.I. from cable but not from mainstream movies.
Now the characters. They are just crap! You have the list of clichés: dim hot girl who just happens to see ghosty stuff others don’t, her hot dim boyfriend, a single mom trying to make it work, a token black guy who is “comic” relief , an eccentric town junk collector who finds a clue, and a drunken priest who is also….wait….of Irish descent. These characters really offer nothing of interest thorough the film. The boyfriend, Nick, basically just drives to and from locations and sometimes picks up or delivers people along the way. Nick is the male lead and he is basically a taxi he does nothing else. The priest, who was a big part of the original, is just worthless here. He does nothing but drink, babble and die stupidly. There is nothing redeeming about any of these people. I didn’t care if they lived or died. I just wanted this to end.
There is nothing good here. It is an awful remake of a damn fun John Carpenter film. This should have never been made.
Well one down. Next up is the reboot of……. The Crazies!
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